Mother’s Favourite Song Helps Kathi Through Grief


Kathi Murphy

Can music be a way for the departed to show their continuing love?

Kathi believes so. In the story below, she tells of times when she heard special music that assured her  both her parents were there in times of need.

My family is very musical, so it seems so fitting that my experiences with Mom and Dad after they passed on have been musical ones. These messages reassured me that all was fine with my loved ones, even after they had left their physical bodies behind.

Mom’s Celebration of Life, 2001

As we were preparing for my Mom’s Celebration of Life we searched her apartment but no one could find a copy of her favourite song, “Crazy” by the late country singer Patsy Cline. We found other cassettes with other songs but sadly not that one. Meanwhile, the reception hall provided a cassette player for us to use at the gathering and there was a tape already in it that had been left by the people who’d used it previously. When we turned on the machine it played “Crazy” by Patsy Cline. Amazed, we questioned each other, but no one in our group had placed it there.

I eventually purchased a Patsy Cline CD but didn’t play it right away. I thought of my dear Mom every day, though, and one day I felt very strongly that she was near. In order to be alone to think about her, I brought our cassette/CD player into my bedroom and closed the door. I placed the Patsy Cline CD in the machine and pressed play. The first song was “Crazy” and, as it played, my tears flowed.

As I waited for the next song to play, “Crazy” played again from the beginning. This happened 3 times before it moved on to the next song and I have no idea how. I was never able to make the machine do that again. Although I was surprised at first by this strange happening, I also took great comfort in it, because I felt Mom was reaching out to me.

During the next few years, I would go for walks in the woods and think of Mom. Unable to hug her physically as I once could, I would feel the need to wrap my arms around myself, and it always felt as if she was returning my hug. These experiences were very comforting. I felt no fear, just a sense of being safe and loved.

Dad’s Funeral 2005

As my husband and I drove home after Dad’s funeral service, this thought occurred to me: We are all simply “dust in the wind,” an expression made famous in a song by the group Kansas. A few minutes later that very song came on the radio station that we happened to be listening to.

That same year, I had an experience with both my parents. They had divorced when I was a teenager and it had been a particularly difficult separation. One night, I saw a vision of them both standing together, holding hands and smiling down on me. It felt as if they were reassuring me that all had been forgiven and that there was much love for everyone.

About 5 years later my son, who is an avid guitar player, decided to take singing lessons.  My family had frequent music nights where we sang and played instruments. He rarely sang solo. This particular music night, he began to play and sing a new song he had learned, and to my surprise and amazement it was “Dust in the Wind” by Kansas.  I hugged him after and explained what the song meant and why it was so amazing that he had chosen that particular song to learn. I hadn’t told him about hearing that song after his grandfather’s funeral. When I asked him yesterday why he chose that particular song, he told me, “Honestly, I just really liked it. The guitar picking went really well with my lessons.”

My Illness in 2014

In September 2014, I went through a tough time. I became very ill with an infection that necessitated emergency surgery. The doctors had a great deal of trouble inserting my breathing tube, and I was unconscious for two days after the surgery. During my long recovery, I had difficulty finding any joy in life.

One particularly rough day, I asked Mom to help me. What I received was that same “safe” feeling and the hug I had felt on my walks in the woods. Next, I asked her to play our song. The following day my husband and I were listening to our usual radio station, which does not play country and western music. But, through the speakers came the voice of Patsy Cline singing “Crazy.” And, just in case I hadn’t gotten the message, that song played again on the same radio station one week later.

The comfort I felt during these moments helped me to know that the energy and love that are my Mom and Dad are forever with me.

Can you think of a time when music brought you a particularly special feeling about a loved-one who had passed on? If not music, what about some other special signal?

The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us at and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

3 thoughts on “Mother’s Favourite Song Helps Kathi Through Grief

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