How Could Mom’s Death be a Happy Time?

Photo by Shawn Parsons, Blossoms and Blooms

For many of us, the death of a parent is particularly difficult, because we have unresolved issues that have accumulated over the years, and that remain unresolved at the time of our parent’s passing. Below, Maggie tells us about her long estrangement from her mother and brother due to their mother’s schizophrenia. In later years, she and her mother were able to heal their rift, and her brother was able to be present in the hours before their mother passed away. This reunion–even as her mother lay dying–led Maggie to declare to the cleric who was present at the time that she felt like she’d “won the lottery.” And, as Maggie shows us here, the healing continues–even after her mother’s physical presence is gone.


By Maggie Martin

 In my family, we were all estranged from each other. I left home in Ontario, Canada, at the age of 19, unable to cope on my own with the increasing challenges of my mother’s schizophrenia. My brother Larry had left several years earlier, and my parents had already separated during my early teens because Dad couldn’t cope either.

Mom’s illness prevented her from forming close, loving and lasting relationships, and it was only in the last ten years of her life that I learned to accept her for who she was. During that time, we spent many hours together and I came to adore her. In the intervening years, however, I had only minimal contact with Mom. Larry didn’t see her during this period, so I didn’t see him either. He had relocated across the country to Calgary, Alberta.

Despite all of this, I knew I was very much loved by my mom in the best way she knew how. I believe she adored both my brother and me. Larry’s estrangement was very painful for Mom and me.

When she was in her early sixties, Mom’s schizophrenia spiralled out of control, and she was placed in a retirement home where the medical professionals could monitor and regulate her medications. It was an eight-hour return drive from where Mom lived to where I lived with my husband in Southern Ontario. I still wanted us to be in touch, so I would invite her to come and stay with us. Mom and I became very close. I truly wished my brother could know this person and not the one he had grown up with.

Amazingly, my relationship with Mom only got better and better as I became older. Every Sunday at 4:30 p.m. I would telephone her at the retirement home.  This went on for fifteen years or so.  One Sunday, Mom didn’t answer the phone.  The nurse went to investigate and found her on the floor of her room and immediately called an ambulance.  Then the nurse called me back to let me know that Mom would be admitted to hospital. Early next morning was the soonest I could drive north.  She had an MRI (magnetic resonance imaging) scheduled first thing in the morning, so I arrived on Monday in time to go with her and hold her hand. The plan was that, after she returned to her hospital room, I would go have lunch, then return to her bedside.

“Amazingly, my relationship with Mom only got better and better as I became older.”

I had helped her settle back into bed following her MRI and was just about to leave when my cell phone rang. Even though I have a policy of not answering my phone in the midst of another conversation, I did pick it up. It was Mom’s doctor telling me I needed to immediately let her know that she was extremely ill and dying, and that I needed to phone my brother and tell him the same thing. I was shocked and confused. I knew my face would give that away, so I stumbled out of the room without saying anything to Mom.

A nurse saw me and came immediately to my side and asked, “Are you okay?”  I said, “No”.  

I was still holding my phone and staring at it. The nurse asked me what had happened. I told her what the doctor had said. I think the nurse took the phone from me, perhaps to talk with him. Finally she said, “Follow me. I’ll take you to a room behind the nurses’ station where you can make your phone calls.”

After I entered the room, I stood there staring at the phone on the wall. Then I looked around and was surprised to see a man sitting there. He asked if he could be of help. I told him I needed to make some phone calls. He came to sit next to me and I moved away. He asked if he was bothering me. I said, “Yes,” so he left the room, but not before he conveyed to me—either verbally or telepathically—that I didn’t have to worry about making those calls. Just as he was leaving, the nurse entered. She asked me who he was. When I said, “I don’t know,” she immediately went looking for him.

Soon, the nurse sought me out and told me she hadn’t been able to find the mysterious man, but that I didn’t need to make the calls because the doctor had phoned my brother and had also broken the news to Mom. So, the man in the nurse’s room had been correct. I didn’t have to worry about making those calls.

Only later did I realize who he was: my inner and outer spiritual guide, Harold Klemp. He is the leader of my spiritual path called Eckankar, and I had seen him previously in a public venue, but never before up close. I had always thought of him as larger in stature than he appeared in person. What I did get from our “chance” meeting was that he was there to help when needed, and that all was in its rightful place, both for me and for Mom.

“What I did get from our ‘chance’ meeting was that he was there to help when needed and that all was in its rightful place, both for me and for Mom.”

However, it now became imperative for my brother to come immediately if he wanted to see Mom prior to her death.  He was able to catch the first flight out and arrived from Calgary in the wee hours of Wednesday morning, so exhausted that he lay down on a bed next to Mom’s and slept. Soon afterwards, a nondenominational chaplain came in. Mom was awake now. On one side was her much loved son Larry, and on the other side was her much loved daughter, me.

With a big smile on my face, I exclaimed to the chaplain, “I feel like I just won a million dollars! I feel like I just won the lottery!”. Mom had a broad grin on her face too! She had what she wanted most: Her two children sitting on either side of her. The estrangement was over. Mom died peacefully a few minutes later.

 Since Mom’s death, my brother and I have kept in contact. We have both realized that there never was any disagreement between us; we had simply felt overwhelmed trying to cope with the difficulties of Mom’s disease. Since then, not only have Larry and I kept in touch, but Mom and I keep in touch too.

I recently asked myself anew how Mom communicates with me now. Just as I asked this question, a beautiful female cardinal appeared right in front of me. I could reach out and touch her, she was that close. Cardinals were one of our family’s favourite birds, but it had been a long time since I had spotted one—and I had never seen one where I now live.

The sighting reminded me of an experience I’d had years ago. It was not long after my father passed away. Even though Mom and Dad chose to separate when they were in their early forties, they had never legally formalized it. Technically, they were still married when Dad died at the age of eighty-nine.  He was buried in a small community cemetery close to my home in Southern Ontario. 

During one of Mom’s vacations to my home, she had asked to visit Dad’s grave and say goodbye. So, I drove her there one beautiful, sunny afternoon. Standing at the graveside, Mom said, “I guess I’m a widow now.” That really surprised me, and I could see that, even after all those years of separation, her marriage had been very important to her.

We buried Mom beside Dad. I was by myself when the internment was over at the small community cemetery. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky as I watched a pair of Canada geese fly directly overhead. As a child I had been taught that Canada geese pair for life. To me this signified that Mom was safe, happy and reunited with Dad. She was, once again, with the love of her life.

“There wasn’t a cloud in the sky as I watched a pair of Canada geese fly directly overhead… To me this signified that Mom was safe, happy and reunited with Dad. She was, once again, with the love of her life.”

With the recent appearance of the female cardinal, Mom was answering my question, showing me one way that she does still communicate with me.

Just a day before I finished writing this story, I had a wonderful opportunity to be part of a monthly discussion on the book titled Stranger by the River. It is a poetic book on the secret knowledge of God, written by Paul Twitchell, the modern-day founder of Eckankar. The chapter we were studying that night was titled “Love.” A particular line caught my attention. It said: “But I say that all disagreement between friends and thee comes from impatience. If you have patience, then life will teach thee better.”

As I studied that chapter, I began to understand more about my relationship with Mom, and how and why it changed over the years. What changed was that I learned patience. I stopped arguing with her. Mom was doing the best that she could in her illness, and I was learning to accept her for who she was. During those years that we became closer, I realized I had been given the gift of a mom who was a wonderful, joyful soul. Very simply, I learned to love her as she was—and is—in my ongoing Meaning of Forever relationship with her.


You can learn more about Harold Klemp here; and, about Paul Twitchell and Stranger by the River here.


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us atthemeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

Would Night-Time Visits Change Your Spiritual View?

Andrew sent us this story about his life-long relationship with dogs, and how his dogs have taught him that the loving connection between master and pet continues despite the separation of physical death.


By Andrew A.

Please understand that we are just a ‘normal’, everyday family who never got interested in paranormal stuff or anything weird or spiritual.

We were never religious in any way, but we always believed in God and that all good, kind, loving people are going to be with God in Heaven. That sums up our spirituality for the most part. We never, ever thought we would encounter the things I am going to describe here. But, having experienced them, we have greatly expanded our ideas about the afterlife and all things spiritual.

I grew up with dogs and they were my best friends all through my childhood in Ontario, Canada. In 1987, I got married, moved to Massachusetts, and two years later we had a daughter. I wanted her to grow up with a dog like I did, so we adopted a two-year-old mini poodle from a woman who fostered rescued puppies when my daughter was about three months old in 1989. We called her Fluffy.

In 2000, when Fluffy was too old to play with, my daughter wanted a younger mini poodle, and I wanted to rescue another dog, so, after a lot of fruitless phone calls, eventually I found a breeder in New Hampshire who had a young adult dog that was not up to American Kennel Club specs, so she wanted to get rid of her.

We drove over two hours to see her and fell in love with her immediately. She was seven months old, white, with longer legs than a normal mini poodle and a beautiful, curved tail that arched over her back, even though it was cropped. When she walked, her hips swayed from side to side, like a sexy model; she really was a character.

My daughter called her Angel and she turned out to be that in every way. She was incredibly intelligent, intuitive, sensitive, caring, very perceptive and responsive to human emotions. Angel could run faster than every other dog besides a greyhound, because of her long legs, and she loved teasing other, much bigger dogs to chase her in the park, and then outrunning them to exhaustion.

“My daughter called her Angel and she turned out to be that in every way.”


About six months after we got Angel, my daughter saw an ad in a local magazine saying that two mini poodle puppies were available for adoption. The foster home was very close to where we lived, so I said to my daughter we could go see them, but I didn’t want to get another dog, especially a puppy. However, when we walked into the woman’s home, I just fell in love with the little, black, bouncing bundle of energy that I saw.


She and her brother had been rescued from a terrible situation of starvation and abuse in a puppy mill. Every adult dog in the mill had been euthanized, and she and her brother were the only survivors, being only a couple of months old. I happily paid the woman her small adoption fee and we promised we would take good care of her. My daughter called her Muffin and we took her home to give her a bath (she smelled terrible!) and introduce her to Fluffy and Angel.


Fluffy was too old and deaf and blind to care, but Angel jumped off the bed and ran to us to see what we were holding as soon as we walked in. While we bathed Muffin, Angel stood and watched intently, and being almost one and a half years old, she immediately adopted Muffin as her baby. She was totally possessive and protective of her and even would let Muffin take food and chew toys out of her own mouth.


Muffin just adopted the role of the prized, spoiled baby of the home, and never lacked any self-confidence or assertiveness, even though she was much smaller than Angel. Our afternoons and evenings and weekends were filled with hikes and parks and woodland walks with the dogs, exploring anywhere and everywhere they could go.

They ran down trails, swam in streams, chased each other around baseball diamonds and fields, chased squirrels and rabbits and birds wherever they could find them, and just enjoyed every minute of life together. They were always together, no matter what. Angel found her full identity in being Muffin’s mother and protector and best friend, and Muffin just loved being the adored, spoiled baby of the family.

In October 2004, I had to euthanize Fluffy one night at about 2:00 a.m. She was almost 16 and was clearly in pain. I had never euthanized a pet, and I had no idea how difficult it was, and the aftermath of it. I was absolutely devastated when I left the animal hospital without her. Even though I knew she had had a long, wonderful life with me, I could not shake the grief and sadness. I continued with life as best I could, but I found I could not sleep at night. I was in a hyper-energetic mode and could not calm down.

“I said aloud, Fluffy I am OK, you can go, I will be fine, I have Angel and Muffin to keep me company.”

After two weeks of not sleeping, I knew I was going to be in trouble if I did not calm down and adjust to the loss. Angel obviously picked up on my heightened energy levels and never came near me for those two weeks. She would not sleep at the foot of my bed as she usually did and stayed out of my room and away from me completely. She slept with my daughter on her bed and stayed in her room.

Muffin did not seem bothered by anything, and slept right next to me under the blankets, cuddled against my torso, as usual.

One night I was walking Muffin and Angel in a park, trying to figure out where all this extra energy was coming from and why I could not calm down and get to sleep. I suddenly had the thought that, what if I was not feeling my deep emotions for Fluffy, but rather, what if I was actually feeling Fluffy’s spiritual and emotional energy towards me and for me?

I decided to try release it, and I said aloud, “Fluffy I am OK, you can go, I will be fine, I have Angel and Muffin to keep me company. We had a great time together, but now please go to the Light and be happy, and I will see you when I get to heaven. Don’t worry about me. Go to the Light and be happy.” As soon as I said that, I palpably felt a presence of energy lift off me and leave, and my emotions and energy calmed down. That night Angel came back on my bed as usual, and I was able to sleep again.


Angel and Muffin both had heart murmurs, and my vet told me often that Angel was much worse than Muffin. But there was not much we could do about it. I moved to California for a job in June 2014 with the two dogs, and Angel started to collapse while walking outside. In November, she stopped eating, and five days later, she passed away while lying next to me on my bed. She was just over 15.

I took her body to the  vet and they had her cremated. Muffin and I missed her terribly. I thought Muffin was going to die of depression. She was just totally lost without Angel. She stopped eating for about a week, and it took a lot to get her interested in life again. Eventually she adjusted, but she really was never the same little happy-go-lucky dog ever again.

“I was very confused at first, but I simply had to deduce that Angel had returned to sleep on my bed with me as she usually did.”


Shortly after Angel passed away, I was sleeping deeply one night, but my sleep was disturbed, as I was woken up by a tangible pressure on my legs. That was where Angel used to sleep, at the bottom of my bed, and I often felt her pressing against my legs. In my half-awake state, I assumed she was lying on my legs, and told her to move, as I often had done. Nothing changed. I then remembered that she had just passed away, so I assumed that Muffin must have uncharacteristically gone to the bottom of the bed and was lying on my legs.

I roused myself to move Muffin off my legs, but then I saw Muffin sleeping peacefully right next to me. I was very confused at first, but I simply had to deduce that Angel had returned to sleep on my bed with me as she usually did. I accepted her presence there, moved my legs to make space for her and went back to sleep. This happened a few times afterwards, and then it stopped.


I came back to Toronto to care for my parents in 2016 and I brought Muffin with me. She was then 15-and-a-half. Before I left California, I asked my vet to fill out whatever paperwork Muffin needed to enter Canada, and to give her whatever shots she needed. I had never given her anything but the Rabies vaccine, but that day, in addition to the Rabies, the vet squirted another vaccine up her nose.

That night, Muffin had her first seizure and started to go blind. (Over the next few years, her right eye shrank away and totally disappeared). I thought she was dying. After that, she had a seizure about every two weeks, although some days she had multiple seizures. I gave her some herbal and vitamin supplements and eventually, over several months, the seizures tapered off and stopped.

But I am convinced that Muffin would see Angel every time she had a seizure. After each seizure she would howl and cry incessantly, and run around frantically for hours on end, looking for something. This could last for four or five hours. I would have to take her walking outside or she would go crazy inside. Often this was at 1:00 or 2:00 a.m. She would totally ignore me (which was extremely unusual for her) and her food and everything else, other than what she was looking for but could not find, and I have to assume it was Angel.

Eventually she would exhaust herself, fall asleep and then wake up the next day, back to normal, until the next seizure happened. Eventually, when she was almost 19-and-a-half, I recognized that she had very little quality of life; she was deaf, blind, sad, lonely, incontinent, she started having seizures again, and was having trouble standing and walking, so I decided I had to euthanize her. A very, very sad day for me.


I cannot wait to be with my dogs again in heaven, along with all the other wonderful animals I have met on earth.


Note to Readers: If you enjoyed this post, you may also like the Animals are Soul blog. You can find it by clicking here.


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us at themeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

Auntie’s Love Through a Ukulele?

Photo: glutenfreetraveler.ca

When John began taking ukulele lessons soon after the passing of his Hawaiian aunt, he had no idea how his simple attempt to reconnect with his roots would help his family heal. He tells his story below. All names but John’s are changed to protect the privacy of his family.


Ukulele Lesson Brings a Message of Love

By John Sambueno

At the beginning of December 2020, I received an email from my father letting me know my Auntie Kelly had lung cancer and did not have long to live. I had a real, loving connection with her. I had been close to her family growing up and actually lived with her for a year during college in California. Now three thousand miles away in Ontario, Canada, I was very sad not to be with her.

With a heavy heart I called one of my cousins who let me know that, at that moment, the whole family was with Auntie Kelly at the hospice. She took the phone and said to me, “You know Johnny, God always has a plan and I am at peace with His plan for me. I am happy that I have all my family here.” 

I was amazed by how much grace she showed. Auntie was a devout Christian, but at the same time was open to God’s love being much bigger than religion. Many years ago, when she found out that I had begun following a religion called Eckankar, she asked me one question:, “Do you still believe in God?” I said, “Yes.” She replied, “OK.” Nothing else needed to be said.

A few weeks after the phone call, I received an email from my cousin Liz letting me know Auntie Kelly had passed away. I was sad about that, but happy I got a chance to say goodbye.

My Auntie was born and raised in Hawaii but spent her later life in California. I grew up in California, too, but had visited Hawaii a few times when I was much younger to spend time with my grandfather, Auntie Kelly and my cousins before they emigrated.

I was sad, but happy I got a chance to say goodbye.

I have always strongly identified with the Hawaiian part of my heritage. Several months after Auntie’s physical death, I decided to start taking ukulele lessons, feeling it would help me get in touch with my Hawaiian roots. One night I had a vivid dream: I was taking ukulele lessons, and my teacher turned out to be Auntie Kelly. I could feel unconditional love flowing from her, and I was filled with all this love even after the lesson was over. Still in the dream, I hung out with my cousins for a while like I used to when we were younger. It was a wonderful experience.

I have learned over the years that, when I have a vivid dream like this one, Divine Spirit is speaking to me at a deeper level. However, sometimes it takes a little work to decipher the true meaning. Something that helps me figure this out is a spiritual exercise I do every morning for 20-30 minutes. I sing the word HU (pronounced like “hue”) in long, drawn-out breaths. It is a simple, yet beautiful sound that helps me tune into Divine Spirit.

I usually include a visualization technique and, in this instance, Divine Spirit showed me a large bowl, which I realized represented me. There was tea (representing Divine Spirit) being poured into this bowl by my spiritual guide, or inner master. As the tea reached the top of the bowl, it would pour through tubes into small teacups.

Almost instantly, my dream with Auntie Kelly came to mind and I realized exactly what my dream meant. My Auntie had poured a whole bunch of unconditional love into me, but it wasn’t all meant for me. I was now meant to pour this love into other teacups and give it to my cousins. Once I realized this, I could hear my Auntie’s sweet Hawaiian voice say, “Johnny, will you give my love to my children. Please let them know I love them and will always be there for them if they just look within.” As I continued with the spiritual exercise the love filled up in me even more.

Almost instantly after my spiritual exercise ended, though, the mental part of me began to question what I had experienced. So, instead of writing an email to my cousins, I started up my treadmill and walked, wondering if I really should send this message of love. Would my cousins think of me as some weird but well-meaning spiritual person hoping to see something that wasn’t really there?

I could hear my Auntie’s sweet Hawaiian voice say, “Johnny, will you give my love to my children…”

But, as I walked, I continued to be filled with this amazing sense of love—and I heard my auntie’s voice again, “Please send my love to my children.” With a smile, I answered inwardly, “OK Auntie.”

Still, after composing the message to my cousins, I hesitated to send it. This time, I looked to a picture of Harold Klemp, the guide who serves as both my inner and outer master. “Should I actually send this email?” I asked. Instantly, he replied inwardly, “Will you be a fool for me?”

That was all I needed. I knew this was a play on some of Harold Klemp’s writings, in which he talks about being “a fool for God.” Of course I would be a fool for Divine Love. I sent the message and got back on the treadmill. There, I heard my Auntie’s voice one last time saying, “Thank you, Johnny.”

Each of my cousins replied to my message in a very loving way and expressed their gratitude that I shared it. They said how much pain they still felt at the loss of their mother. After reading the short note from my cousin Dan I cried for several minutes, because I could feel so deeply his pain and sorrow. I have a strong bond with Dan, who is outwardly tough and doesn’t show his emotions. I realized I was crying for him. (Although I still consider myself a tough guy, too, I am thankful Divine Spirit has softened me over the years.)

Looking back on the entire experience, I feel humbled and grateful that Divine Spirit and my Auntie gave me the opportunity to be a messenger of love to my cousins, who were still in such despair. What a gift it was to serve in that way, and to catch a glimpse into the wonder of eternity, where love and life continue.

I have come to understand the separation between “here” and “there” isn’t as great as I used to believe. In fact, it may all just be a matter of inner perception.


You can learn more about HU and Eckankar here


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us at themeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

Can Death Heal A Relationship?



Often, when a loved-one dies, we refer to having “lost” them. We feel the absence of their physical person as a kind of loss. But, what if that loss from our outer life can translate into a gain for our inner life? What if our loved-one’s departure opens a door into another stage in our relationship that actually boosts our spiritual and psychological well-being? In this story, Kim tells of just such a gain.


Mom – Home in Heaven and in My Heart

By Kim Ward

My mom died in a nursing home from a heart attack and complications of Alzheimer’s Disease on October 11, 2020, at 8:45 P.M.  She had chosen that home six years earlier because she wanted to be with my severely disabled brother Scott, who already resided there.  

When Covid-19 became a significant problem at nursing homes in Ontario, Canada, my sister Shannon and I would have “window visits” with Mom, where we would stand outside and wave to her while talking on cell phones with her nurse, who stood beside her. My mom had years before lost her ability to speak as well as her ability to recognize who we were. Nevertheless, my sister and I visited her as often as we could.

On Friday, October 9, the nursing home called early in the morning to tell us that Mom had gone into a coma and we should come as quickly as we could. Now, with Mom’s death imminent, my sister and I, or my husband Steve and I, could sit by her bedside as long as we were “gowned up’’ and wearing masks and gloves.  

She lay back down, took three breaths and passed away. Steve and I just looked at each other and felt the room filled with love.

The night she died, Steve and I were there. She had not moved or been responsive in any way to anything we said or did. Then I noticed that my brother Scott, who had passed on three years before, was in the room with us. Previously, I had heard that those closest to the dying individual could come and accompany them to Heaven. I saw Scott as a little blue globe hovering near the ceiling in a corner of her room, and I knew it was him. He’d come to take Mom to Heaven.

Scott had been Mom’s favorite. He was her first born and had been medically challenged through most of his life. At birth, Scott had severely crossed eyes and had to have several surgeries to correct that problem. At age eight, he was diagnosed with severe Type One Diabetes and was so ill that he was not expected to live. Later as a young man, he developed Multiple Sclerosis. Mom had always dedicated herself to Scott and he was closest to her. So, it made sense that he would be the one to accompany her to heaven.

As soon as I saw Scott as the blue globe I said, “Mom, Scott is here. He’s waiting to take you to Heaven.” Immediately, Mom came out of her coma and sat up in bed, her eyes wide open with a huge smile on her face. Then, there was just calm. She lay back down, took three breaths and passed away. Steve and I just looked at each other and felt the room filled with love.

I was not overwhelmingly sad when Mom died because her Alzheimer’s meant that we had been saying goodbye to her for a long time. However, it took a few weeks after her death for me to forgive her for having so little time for me throughout my life. I had felt animosity towards Mom for not being there as a nurturing, protecting, loving mother. Now all that animosity is gone.

It happened this way: A friend told me that, often when people have a Near-Death experiences, they meet with a “Love Being” or a ”Being of Light” and are given a review of their lives. Well, perhaps my Mom had that experience at some point, because she seems more “enlightened” now when we meet. She comes to me often, and we communicate telepathically. She has apologized profusely for not giving me the parenting, love, and nurturing that every child needs. She knows she should have better protected me to prevent me from being repeatedly sexually abused by men.

Mom has changed since passing over, and I have changed too.

Mom has changed since passing over, and I have changed too. I have more appreciation of the various factors that kept Mom from having quality time with me. She had four children, two of whom had significant health needs; and, she had a husband who had paranoid schizophrenia, was a severe alcoholic and stayed in the basement all the time. Mom was responsible for the family finances as well as for care of our home and all of us children.

I now know that Mom had always loved me, but dealing with all she had to deal with, she simply had no time or energy for me. Now our relationship is one of all-encompassing acceptance, forgiveness and abiding love. Everything I have been through is worth the love I now feel. Death didn’t take Mom away from me. It gave her back to me.

You might ask how I am able to have this loving and healing contact with my Mom after her death. My answer would be that I know my Mom is alive in Heaven. Only her physical body has died. With an open, willing, and loving heart, I ask my Mom to come to be with me. Then she does.


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us atthemeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

What Happens When We Ask for a Visit?


Image from Wikipedia: “European Robin”


John in Stoke-on-Trent, England, recently retired from his career in palliative and end-of-life care. He would sit overnight with people in their own homes. “Many times I was there at the very end,” he writes.

Often during his vigils, John would have something with him to read. “This particular night I was reading about dream visitations from loved ones. The book suggested that, before you go to sleep, you should ask your loved one to come and visit you in your dream.

“When I got home from my night sit and went to bed, I asked my Mum or Dad to come to me if they could.” John says what followed was a “stark and vivid dream:”

“My wife and I were in a street next to where we actually live in real life. My wife said, ‘Look, there’s your Mum.’ I turned and saw her coming out of a house. I ran over to her and we hugged, then she said, ‘I love you.’ My wife then came and hugged my Mum, and I said, ‘Come back to the house,’ but she said no, that she had lots to do. Then she was gone.”

John says he bolted awake, deeply affected by the dream. “I was so happy because I knew my Mum had answered my plea. I have no doubt whatsoever about that.”

John’s Dad didn’t come in a dream, but he made himself known in a meaningful way all the same.

“This particular afternoon, I was lying on the bed listening to my iPod,” writes John. “It had several hundred songs and I had set them to play randomly. My mind drifted to thoughts of my dad and a song that had meant a lot to both of us from the time I was very young: I Left My Heart in San Francisco sung by Tony Bennett. Aloud I said, ‘Do you remember our song, Dad?’ The song that was playing came to an end, and the next one to come on was Tony Bennett singing I Left My Heart in San Francisco.”

“I was so happy because I knew my Mum had answered my plea. I have no doubt whatsoever about that.”

John and his wife Janette have had experiences that add credence to folklore that the departed can sometimes communicate with those left behind through physical objects such as coins or feathers. One day, as they drove to a local shopping area, he and Janette were having a conversation about the possibility that angels can leave coins. There were very few cars around as they parked and exited their vehicle.

“Janette got out of the passenger side and saw several coins on the ground, which amazed us, as we had just been having that particular conversation. She picked them all up and we went into the shop. When we came back out a few minutes later, no additional cars had arrived but there were more coins by her passenger door.”

Another day, he and Janette found two ten-pence coins. “I can’t remember now where we found them, but I know it was a place you wouldn’t normally find coins,” John writes. “I’m not sure why, but I asked Janette what years were stamped on the coins. She said one was from 1992 and the other 2008. My Mum passed away in 1992 and my mother-in-law in 2008.”

On the morning of a memorial for Janette’s mother, she and John reminisced about her as he drove Janette to work at a local shop. “It was early and there were no customers, so she was on her own filling the shelves and feeling sad, thinking of her Mum. Suddenly, a small white feather came floating down right in front of her face,” says John, who believes this was a symbol of love from mother to daughter.

And this was not the only experience with a white feather. A couple of nights before his daughter’s wedding in the summer of 2017, John stopped by his office with some paperwork. Then he got back into his car for the drive home. “It was a warm night, so I had both windows open in the front. As I drove, I thought about the wedding and how lovely it was going to be. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a small white feather come through the passenger window and fall very slowly until it settled on the passenger seat.” He took this as assurance that someone else agreed.

A few years ago Zoe, a friend of John’s daughter Claire, died of breast cancer. Soon after, his daughter came for a visit, and they talked about the sad loss. “I said to Claire that every woman should check herself for cancer. The words had hardly left my lips when directly in my eyeline a wicker heart that hung on a ribbon from a hook on the living room door fell to the floor. I went to the heart, expecting the ribbon to be broken, but everything was intact.” This left them considering whether this sudden call for their attention was confirmation from Zoe that Claire should heed her father’s advice.

“Eventually, I started to ask him to come and visit us. Sometimes he did and sometimes he didn’t.”

But John and his family’s experiences with the dearly departed have not been exclusively with humans. There was the beloved cat Dexter, who died during surgery for a tumor. “That was nine in the morning,” says John. “We were all very upset. About noon that same day, my daughter and I were talking about Dexter and feeling very sad. Suddenly I heard a funny noise and asked Claire if she could hear it, too. That was when we realized it was white noise coming from the radio. It had turned itself on. There was no talking or music, just static. We knew this was Dexter letting us know he was OK. The radio had never done that before and has not done it since.”

Then, there was Billy, the rescue cat the family had taken in five years earlier. “He had been very poorly but we nursed him back to health. We loved him deeply. Sadly, one of our neighbours poisoned him with antifreeze and he passed away.”

John says that sometime later, things began to happen in bed at night, where Billy had made a habit of sleeping. One night John and his wife felt something walking over their feet and thought it must  be Billy.
“Eventually, I started to ask him to come and visit us. Sometimes he did and sometimes he didn’t.”

At one point, though, John went to hospital for a hip replacement. On his first night home, the wound from surgery was giving him a lot of pain. “I asked Billy to come to me, then went to sleep and awoke sometime later. My wife was asleep and I just lay there not thinking about anything in particular. Then, all of a sudden, I felt a thud on the bed and my wound started to pulsate for about thirty seconds. Then it began to itch ferociously for the same amount of time. I began to realize that I was being given a healing by my beloved cat.”

John and Janette have felt Billy on their bed many times since he passed away. One night, John had gone to bed and left his wife and daughter watching television downstairs. There were lights turned on, both in the kitchen and the living room, which are separated by a glass paneled door. Suddenly, Janette became aware of the huge figure of a cat filling the glass in the doorway. “It had a large body and tail and a huge head,” says John. Janette told Claire what she was seeing, so Claire walked toward the door and the cat began to get smaller, “as if it were deflating.” By the time Claire had reached the door, the apparition had disappeared.

The following night, John went to work at one of the local hospitals and, before beginning his duties, began a conversation with a switchboard operator he hadn’t met before. “I told her about the cat figure in the door and that Billy visits us regularly.” John was surprised when she told him she was a psychic medium. “She told me that, in her opinion, that visit was Billy showing us his power—which made sense to me.”

“We wonder if Billy is always with us, or if he whizzes down from heaven, or if he knows in advance I’m going to ask him to come. It blows our minds, really.”

John has often felt Billy’s weight on the bed after asking him to visit, and they’ve talked about it as a family. “We wonder if Billy is always with us, or if he whizzes down from heaven, or if he knows in advance I’m going to ask him to come. It blows our minds, really.”

A couple of years ago, Janette was diagnosed with heart failure. One day, prior to a medical appointment, she and John arrived at the hospital and parked the car. “As we walked along the path, a robin landed in front of us, and it was looking at us. We continued walking and it seemed to be following us. It landed, again, in front of us and looked up at us. Then it flew onto a nearby branch. I went up and said hello. It had no fear at all. There were other people around, but it was definitely focusing on us.

“I said to Janette, somebody is with us. We are both great believers in that.”


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us atthemeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

Greetings from The Other Side–or Just Coincidences?

This story was originally published on our December 16, 2018, blog. We thought you might like to see it again here–with an update at the end.


Bonnie, a retired Registered Nurse, describes herself as “steeped in Western science,” so it’s with a healthy dose of self-doubt that she recounts the following experiences.

Last August, she helped nurse her dear friend Jennifer through the late stages of an aggressive cancer called mesothelioma. Bonnie sensed that her friend would soon die, but she and her husband had a long-standing annual commitment to host another couple at their summer cottage in Northern Ontario.

Like Bonnie, Jennifer was a practical, matter-of-fact person; so, when Bonnie explained she would be absent for a few days, Jennifer understood. And, when Bonnie asked her friend for a favour in case she died before they were able to speak again, Jennifer agreed. Despite her own skepticism, Bonnie asked that Jennifer pass along greetings in the afterlife to some departed loved ones: Jean, a friend and mother of Bonnie’s God-children, who died more than 20 years ago; then, Bonnie’s parents, and the parents of her husband.

Just to make sure, Jennifer ticked off the names on her fingers before Bonnie left: “Jean, Don and Jean, Phyllis and Andy. Right?”

“Right,” said Bonnie.

While at the cottage, Bonnie would sit at a small desk in the kitchen to keep in touch with Jenifer’s family through phone calls and text messages. One night, she awakened suddenly and went to the kitchen thinking a cup of hot milk might help put her back to sleep. There, she found the light above the desk illuminated. This was strange, because Bonnie and her husband Kenn are sticklers for turning off lights that are not in use. Before returning to bed, Bonnie made sure to switch it off. The following morning Kenn, who’d been first in the kitchen, asked Bonnie why that light was still on when he got up. Bonnie said, “I think Jennifer was here last night! Twice!” Jennifer died later that day.

Just to make sure, Jennifer ticked off the names on her fingers before Bonnie left: “Jean, Don and Jean, Phyllis and Andy. Right?”

Three weeks afterward, Bonnie and Kenn settled into their usual seats at a concert hall looking forward to another performance by the philharmonic orchestra. They’d made a nodding acquaintance with the couple normally seated next to them but, on this occasion, those seats were occupied by someone else. The woman looked oddly familiar.

“I have an extraordinary memory for names and faces,” recalls Bonnie, “but I just couldn’t pull this one together.”

They spoke for a while, trying to place each other. Then, finally, Bonnie turned to her seat neighbor and asked, “Are you Dorothy, Jean’s friend?”

“Yes,” replied the woman. “I am.”

The last time Bonnie had seen Dorothy was at her friend Jean’s funeral two decades before. This was a coincidence too extraordinary for even a skeptic to ignore.

“Okay, Jennifer,” thought Bonnie. “First one off the list.”

Bonnie has a ring and a pair of earrings set with diamonds from jewelry left by her mother, who was also named Jean, and her mother-in-law, Phyllis. She was wearing them—plus a cameo from Phyllis that she’d put on for the first time—one evening in late fall after an early snow. She and Kenn had a date to meet their son for dinner but they had errands to run first, including a stop at the community mail box.

Finally seated at the dinner table, Bonnie realized one of her earrings was missing. Immediately, they searched under the table, then husband and son retraced their steps to the car and searched there but came up empty handed. Strangely, Bonnie felt no distress. She knew the earring would turn up. As she and Kenn drove home after dinner, they made a stop at the mailbox once again. There, he shone the headlights from various angles while Bonnie searched in the snow for the missing earring.

“Just as I was about to give up, what do I see sitting on top of the snow but my earring!” says Bonnie. “So I said, Thank you, Phyllis.”

Number two off the list.

“It’s like Jennifer is taking her time saying hello to these people,” says Bonnie with a smile in her voice. “And they are saying hello back to me.”

The stories move into early December now, and this one has Bonnie and Kenn getting ready to attend a funeral home visitation for Cameron, the middle-aged son of long-time friends, who died very suddenly. They’ve come to the point of picking a tie to go with the jacket Kenn plans to wear. Bonnie looks on as Kenn brings out his collection. A tie neither of them has seen before catches her eye. It has just the right colours.

When they turn it over to read the label, they realize it comes from a shop in Bermuda, where Bonnie’s parents often vacationed. Kenn must have acquired the tie after his father-in-law’s death, but neither of them recalls seeing it in the 17 years since. Perhaps this is a hello from Don at a time when reassurance from “the other side” means a lot.

So, keeping score to this stage: Bonnie has now received signals from Jean, her beloved friend who passed away many years ago; from Phyllis, her mother-in-law; and, from Don and Jean, Bonnie’s parents.

A week later, after having attended Cameron’s funeral earlier in the day, Bonnie is out with friends where she relates her stories about Jean and Phyllis. As she returns home, despite their habit of not keeping lights on unnecessarily, she notices Kenn has left a light on in the hallway. She turns it off and goes to bed, leaving the house in darkness. The next morning when she comes downstairs, the Christmas Village scene in the family room is illuminated.

The message from these lights? “It takes a village to look after a family,” says Bonnie, thinking of Cameron, his grieving parents, his young widow and his two very wee children.

Having retired from nursing, Bonnie now has time to pursue another passion, which is writing. With one book published, she’s been working lately on her second. But, given the upheaval of the past few months, she hasn’t been particularly motivated or inspired.

“It takes a village to look after a family,” says Bonnie, thinking of Cameron, his grieving parents, his young widow and his two very wee children.

For two days recently, though, all that changed. Bonnie wonders if it has something to do with a necklace she was wearing—because for those two days, Bonnie wrote freely. Normally, she doesn’t wear jewelry around the house, but she felt the urge to this one time. The necklace had been a gift from her mother.

“I had two exhilarating writing days. I was just over the moon ecstatic,” she says. “I wonder if it had something to do with her…

“As I’m saying this, it just sounds absurd to me,” says Bonnie, “but I’ve learned to trust in my experience.”

And, even though the skeptic “steeped in Western science” still questions whether her experiences were real, Bonnie looks forward to hearing from the one remaining loved one on the list she gave to Jennifer.

“It might take some time for the ones we love to get in touch,” says Bonnie, “but they will when the time is right.”


Postscript

In preparation for re-posting Bonnie’s story, we reached out to ask whether she’s heard from her father-in-law Andy yet. Here’s her reply:

“That fall, in early December we went to a play…and the young male lead had Andy’s mannerisms, frame, and hairstyling from his youth. That was as close as we got though. At the time, we both commented on the remarkable similarity.”

What do you think? Was that Andy dropping in to finish off Bonnie’s list of greetings from the afterlife, or was it just one more coincidence to round off a remarkable streak of coincidences?


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us at themeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

The Spiritual or The Scientific: Which Approach Appeals to You?

In this blog, which first appeared on The Meaning of Forever on June 9, 2017, we present two ways of exploring the concept of life after death. One depends on scientific method, while the other is strictly spiritual. Which one appeals to you?


If we accept the quote in the image above as true, it’s not a stretch to believe that a loved-one who has passed into that next “stage of experience” continues to love those left behind and may, possibly, try to let them know.

Contributors to The Meaning of Forever Project have experienced just that: feelings of love from the person, or animal, who has died. They have been visited in dreams, in visions, through sounds, the appearance of articles that hold special meaning, and in many other ways. Some have had near-death experiences that, by showing how life continues after death, help them deal with the loss of those close to them.

In our previous post, a dream experience allowed a grieving mother to hold her daughter once again. Another contributor wrote of feeling both ecstasy and grief at the time of her mother’s passing; one described how her much-loved dog returned to her in a new body; yet another described how sounds and discovery of small articles demonstrated that her grandparents and her mother continued to be with her long after their physical bodies were gone.

The common thread in all these experiences is love, a love that lives beyond time and space, beyond the physical bodies of those who share it.

Harold Klemp writes that soul is the essential, animating part of every individual, that this essence within each of us can never die, and that its defining nature is love.

“…Soul, knowing of its divine nature, sees beyond the ends of eternity and knows It can never be extinguished like a candle’s flame.”

Harold klemp – spiritual wisdom on life after death

“…Soul, knowing of its divine nature, sees beyond the ends of eternity and knows It can never be extinguished like a candle’s flame,” he writes in Spiritual Wisdom on Life After Death.

In her book Surviving Death, journalist Leslie Kean applied objectivity and scientific method to her research into the possibility of an afterlife. Here’s what she says in her introduction:

“While exploring the evidence for an afterlife, I witnessed some unbelievable things that are not supposed to be possible in our material world. Yet they were unavoidably and undeniably real…I came to realize that there are still aspects of Nature that are neither understood nor accepted, even though their reality has profound implications for understanding the true breadth of the human psyche and its possible continuity after death.”

Kean documents what she calls “after death  communications” (ADCs) in the form of “dream visits”, moving forms or apparitions, effects on electrical items, lights, voices, sounds and smells. She says these ADCs sometimes come as a shock because they are often unasked for and may occur for people who would never consider such things possible. Kean acknowledges that many people—including herself—are uncomfortable talking about these phenomena.

“Because they come and go quickly, and are rarely documented, ADCs are not evidential in a strict sense. Yet, these experiences can be the most potentially life-changing link to belief in survival for their recipients, because the messages can be so profoundly personal and specific,” writes Kean.

You can find both Kean’s and Klemp’s books listed on the Resources Page of The Meaning of Forever website.

So, perhaps that the dream you had—or the fleeting image you saw, the sound of a voice long gone from this earth, or the feeling your dear one was there beside you—was not just your mind playing tricks on you. It may be that it was your loved one saying in a manner meant specially for you, “I’m fine in my new life, and I love you as I always have.”

At The Meaning of Forever Project, we value and honour any experience you may have had with a departed loved one that has made you feel loved and helped you move forward in your grief. If you would like to share that experience with us, please do at themeaningofforever@gmail.com

See our website, Facebook page and previous blog posts to find out more about The Meaning of Forever book project.

Can A Simple Butterfly Bring Comfort In Grief?

Photo courtesy of Pinterest


Mellie and her grandmother were best friends, and when she found out her Nanny had suffered a serious stroke, her first reaction was numbness: “I was completely devoid of feelings,” writes Mellie.

But that changed as soon as she walked into the hospital room.

“Immediately I felt scared. Scared for what she must be going through mostly, since she couldn’t communicate. I was also scared for myself. What was going to happen?” All sense of control was gone, says Mellie.

Soon the fear became anger.

“I didn’t approve of this event happening in my life. This wasn’t okay with me, I was thinking, all the while knowing deep within that I had in fact signed up for this, and there was a lesson for me hidden beneath the sadness.”

Even though Nanny could not communicate outwardly, says Mellie, something began to happen between them. Once, while in the hospital gift shop, “I saw the most beautiful butterfly kimono, and in my head Nan’s voice was telling me how beautiful it was and that I needed to buy it. I wore that kimono every time I visited her.

“Prior to Nan’s stroke, we’d had a conversation about how she would appear after she passed on and we agreed she would come back as a butterfly, because she thought they were so beautiful and had always loved them. I didn’t know at the time, but this kimono became the first of many visits I would receive from butterflies.”

“…this kimono became the first of many visits I would receive from butterflies.”

Eventually, Mellie began to feel guilt. “My nanny was my best friend, a woman that I considered to be one of m y soul mates and, yet, seeing her lying there in that bed with half of her brain function lost, I eventually began wishing for her to go.”

Still, Mellie kept up her visits. “I could feel her spirit drifting in and out of her body. Sometimes it felt like she was there and other times I felt no connection to her body at all. She was all around me, flying about like a butterfly.”

Finally, deciding she couldn’t bear the idea of her Nan not returning to the woman she’d been, Mellie decided it must be time to let her go. “I felt shameful for having these thoughts, and yet when I discussed them with my family, I found they felt very similarly.

“My Nanny passed peacefully on August 29, 2015.”

Now, Mellie began to feel th e loss. Her Nanny was gone forever. They would never again share a hug or a cup of tea and a chat. “I would never again hear her tell me she loved me.”

A few days after her death, though, Nanny got through to Mellie. A family member who also happened to be a psychic medium, contacted Mellie with a message from her: “(She) wanted me to let go, spread my wings and fly, just as she had done only days ago. She offered me her strength to make that a reality.”

The following March, Mellie tried another means to connect with Nanny. This time, though, it was to let her go. “I felt that I was holding her back in some way, tying her down to the earthly realm. Wishing that she hadn’t left was making it difficult for me to carry on, so I thought that it may be time to let that go.”

Mellie signed up for an exercise called “conscious connected breathing” in which participants use breathing techniques to bridge between their conscious and unconscious. “During the breathing, the woman assisting me began massaging my hands. As she held my hand, hers felt like my Nanny’s. It was an odd sensation, so I quickly dismissed it. When the exercise was coming to an end, I rolled over to eye-gaze with my breathing partner. The man I was paired with had blue eyes like my Nanny’s. When I gazed into them, I had a strong feeling of looking into the eyes of my Nanny.

“In that moment, I realized that she is all around me.”

“In that moment, I realized that she is all around me. Her spirit lives inside of me and every other person. The oneness of the universe really became apparent to me through my breathing experience.”

Mellie says that even after that event, her Nanny continued to communicate with her through butterflies. “Whether it be an encounter with a live butterfly, or even just my eye catching a butterfly on someone’s scarf, I knew all of these butterflies were being sent by her.

“Nanny also tuned me in to certain songs. I would be contemplating some aspect of my life and the perfect song would come on the radio to answer my question. Each time this happened, my heart knew it was a message from her.”

Little more than a year after her grandmother’s passing, Mellie was getting ready for her wedding when she consulted a medium hoping for another message from her grandmother. She was not disappointed.

“My Nanny told me that I was on the perfect path, and that every decision I had made was the perfect one. That each choice had led me to this moment.

“She also told me that, on the other side, she had created the most beautiful garden she could ever imagine, but that no garden was more beautiful than watching me bloom into the young woman I am today.”

Nothing is more comforting than being able to know her grandmother’s still there, says Mellie, and her  experiences move her to offer words of wisdom for others finding their way through grief:

“If I can offer anything to help others in their grieving process, it would be to let all of your feelings be truly expressed. There is no map for grief, and I don’t believe that grieving ever ends, it just changes form.”

“The signs from our loved ones aren’t always overt,” she says. “Sometimes they can be very subtle, but when you open yourself to this form of communication and you feel like something is a sign from someone on the other side, like it was orchestrated perfectly for this moment, don’t dismiss those feelings. They are real and will bring such comfort in the days, weeks and years following a loved one’s death.

“If I can offer anything to help others in their grieving process, it would be to let all of your feelings be truly expressed. There is no map for grief, and I don’t believe that grieving ever ends, it just changes form.

“Know that your loved ones are always with you. A piece of them lives on within you, and so you can never be truly apart from them. Like a butterfly, they have flown from their cocoon. A new story is only just beginning.”


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us at themeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

Can Dreams Help with Sudden Loss?

On The Meaning of Forever blog, we’ve posted many stories from people who have had comforting dreams featuring their deceased loved ones. And we’ve often referred to the research of Dr. Joshua Black, who earned his doctorate degree in psychology based on pioneering research into what he calls “grief dreams.”

On a website called nextavenue, based in Minneapolis-St. Paul, MN, writer Kevyn Burger interviews Black and others to begin putting grief dream research into the context of the Covid 19 pandemic and the trauma of sudden loss. You can read the full article by clicking here.


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us atthemeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, and our Meaning of Forever Website.

Can Dogs go to Heavenly Rehab?

Perhaps you’ve accepted the idea that, after our loved ones (people at least) exit this life, they spend time learning and trying new things—preparing, maybe, for their next mission. Well… what if this is true for animals, too? In this story, first published on Animals are Soul, Lois relates how dreams showed her the progress of a dear departed dog who was being made ready to come back as a rambunctious golden puppy.  It is reprinted here with permission.


DREAMS OF A GOLDEN PUPPY BEING REBORN

By Lois Stanfield, Minnesota, USA

When my newly adopted, rescued Afghan Hound, Lila, came to live with my other Afghan, Pistachio, and me, I had to help her accept her newfound freedom. Eventually she graduated from being a dog who had lived in a kennel to a beloved house pet. After a while she blossomed into quite a character. She started talking all the time in the way dogs talk. She always had something to say and was quite definite about what she wanted. Ultimately, she ruled the roost.

Although each dog had a bed, one was more comfortable than the other. Being senior resident in the household, Pistachio had the softer bed. But Lila wanted that bed and would sometimes sit on top of him until he got up and left. Then she’d claim the preferred bed. She was hilarious, and the two of them made a cute little couple.

Pistachio was kind and patient with Lila, and they grew to love each other. We had a wonderful three and a half years together. Because she had never known human love before coming to my home, Lila was more comfortable bonding with me through Pistachio. He was like her little husband, and she loved me because he loved me.

Pistachio passed away when Lila was about thirteen, and she was extremely depressed at the loss of her best friend. It took some time, but gradually she bonded more and more with me. Before long it got to where we spent every evening snuggled up together on the sofa. Lila captured my heart like no other. Our time together was precious, and I loved her dearly.

Lila’s Journey

At the age of fourteen and a half, Lila developed serious health issues. The veterinarian did all she could to help her recover, but true to her nature, Lila was quite clear in letting me know what she wanted. It was her time to go. With love and gratitude for the time she had spent with me, I let her move on with her own spiritual journey.

My previous animal companions had always communicated after their death where they were, what they were doing, and what their next lifetime would be. I would get insights either in the dream state or during a spiritual exercise. But after Lila passed, I didn’t get any visits or information from her. Nothing. It was like a complete void.

After a few weeks with no inner messages, I asked for help from the Mahanta, my inner spiritual guide. Even though Lila had experienced over three years of love in my home, she’d previously endured ten years of abuse. In a spiritual exercise, I was told that Lila was being rehabilitated on the inner planes, and I could not see her.

So I let go, trusted, and moved on with my life.

Khiley

I adopted a beautiful, seven-year-old, male Afghan Hound named Khiley, who had been rescued from the same kennel situation as Lila three and a half years earlier. He lived with a dear friend of mine, Louise, who had four other Afghans.

Khiley had some emotional damage and did not get along with Louise’s other dogs. Life was miserable for all of them, as he could not adjust to the pack. He wanted a person who would be all his own—someone he could bond with and devote himself to. I was the perfect “mom” for him. He entered my life, filling the gaping hole that Lila’s departure had left.

A Dream with Lila

A few months after adopting Khiley, I began to once again wonder about Lila and had a dream with her. She’d graduated from the inner-world rehab center and was in a halfway house where she could safely and gradually reorient herself into entering a new physical life. A wonderful man served as caretaker there. Lila had all the treats and toys she wanted, and she played with other dogs. Appearing to be about two years old, she was cute, fluffy, happy, and spunky. She looked fantastic.

At the halfway house in my dream I wanted to embrace Lila, but she ran away. The caretaker winked at me and said, “I think she likes it here. She’s not ready to come back yet.” As the dream ended, I knew Lila was progressing and everything was good. I had to let go and not be concerned about her.

Many more months passed, and I bonded more and more deeply with my beloved Khiley. Then I had yet another dream with Lila. This time, she ran to play with me. I knew she was letting me know that she was getting ready to return. But when, where, and how remained a mystery.

A month later, I dreamed of a little golden puppy being born and received inner confirmation that Lila was coming back very soon. Not long after the dream, I learned that Louise was going to breed her female Afghan. In a few months, there would be a new litter of Afghan Hound puppies. I felt certain Lila would be returning in that litter.

I started thinking, OK. Lila’s coming back. What am I going to do? If I adopt her in her new puppy body, it won’t be good for Khiley. I didn’t know what to do and had to surrender the situation to Divine Spirit.

The puppies were born, and one of them, true to my dream, had gold coloring. Normally, Afghan Hounds have big litters of eight to ten puppies, but Louise’s new litter consisted of only two. She and her sister each wanted one. This meant I didn’t have to make a choice about adopting a reincarnated Lila. Louise chose the gold puppy for herself, and her sister took the other one.

Sprite

After getting to know Louise’s puppy, I realized she was, indeed, Lila. As Soul, Lila had chosen to reincarnate not with me but near me. This put her into the fabulous home of one of my dearest friends. And I would get to see her all the time.

Louise named the “Lila” puppy Sprite. She was huge at birth and soon grew fat, attaching herself to her mother and nursing on her continuously. The other puppy in the litter was small and normal. As Sprite, the Soul in this tiny new puppy body seemed to be making up for the hunger previously endured as Lila. Sprite was the fattest puppy I’d ever seen.

This golden puppy grew into the most gorgeous creature—the color of pale butter, with a black mask. Louise watches in amazement at how Sprite reacts to me. Sprite loves people but isn’t quite as enthusiastic with other visitors as she is with me. When I visit, she almost literally comes flying to me. If I sit down, she leaps into my lap. I get mauled with doggy kisses.

Louise calls me Auntie, because I’m like this puppy’s aunt. Sprite’s affection has been affirmation that she truly is Lila returned. I love her dearly in this lifetime too and am grateful to see her often. As a wonderful side benefit, Khiley got to keep his mommy completely to himself. He has become the sweetest, most loving dog I’ve ever had.

I’ve learned much from my beloved dogs in the many years they have come and gone. Most of all, they have taught me how the love between Souls, whether in an animal or a human body, is unbreakable and timeless. For me, there is no superior form of love. The love between a husband and wife, a parent and child, or a person and a pet—all are expressions of the divine love of God.

Love is love. Love is all.

—Photos by Lois Stanfield


Click on this link to the Animals are Soul blog to read “A Rescue that Changed My Life,” the prequel to Lois’s story.


“Dreams of a Golden Puppy Being Reborn” by Lois Stanfield is published with permission of Eckankar. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Eckankar, 2019, www.Eckankar.org. The story was first published in “Animals Are Soul” blog, www.AnimalsAreSoul.blog.


The Meaning of Forever Project continues to accept stories of comforting experiences with loved ones–animal or human–who have passed on, and of near-death experiences that have helped to show the continuation of life beyond the physical body. You can email your story to us at themeaningofforever@gmail.com and you can find more about our project on our Facebook page, or our Meaning of Forever Website.